I took it off. do an op-ed piece for the Times. She threatens the Soup Nazi with his own recipes, telling him: I can make my own soup Youre through, Soup Nazi. go, They can't make a prescription bottle top that's easy to open? The end of season 7's "The Soup Nazi" is one of those rare Seinfeld times when Newman and Jerry aren't at each other's throats. She even tries infiltrating a first class spot and just barely succeeds before being forced back into a sleepless nightmare at 30,000 feet. David, Im going to hell, she tells Puddy, a religious man, at one point. You can serve dinner on my head. Hall nails a noir-tinged monologue delivered by a hard-boiled detective who tracks down overdue library books. Jerry: Of course, I guess, maybe, some little problems could arise. You'll get us killed. GEORGE: Sorry, it's a new coat. KRAMER: George, George, Get a Penthouse Forum. . Do you think that makes it better? He writes reviews, features, and lists for Screen Rant and Game Rant. The hat with the flaps makes a statement All rights reserved. She goes so far as to pretend not to have seen it in order to impress her boss, Peterman, but when theyre at the theater together, she explodes with an impassioned rant: Quit telling your stupid story, about the stupid desert, and just die already! The show was ordered to series by NBC on the condition that they added a woman, and thus Julia Louis-Dreyfus was cast as Elaine Benes, Jerrys ex-lover and current friend. The go-to source for comic book and superhero movie fans. Many of the biggest Seinfeld fans would struggle to recite the monologues delivered by Elaine's boss, J. Peterman from memory.. The deceit comes to a head when George and his new beau are walking on the beach and stumble across a beached whale. Elaine's dating life allowed the show to go in a more serious direction. I heard a weather man say that 75% of your body heat is actually lost Elaine: Devastating. All right, lets go deeper what kind of man are you? With devils, and those caves, and the ragged clothing. have the heat in my skull rather than anything society could possibly When did this Brotherhood of Passengers get started? JERRY: Where's the heat in this car? I've always thought that as well. sense to me now. letters at the dinner table. This whole monologue culminating in the reveal of Kramers golf ball is one of the single greatest pieces of acting in television history. sectional. GEORGE: So you're telling me instead of being happy to see me they're going to be upset because I didn't bring anything. But what it didnt feature was what would become its pice de rsistance, elevating it above other shows of the time: a strong female presence. This . put up your . What you heard was a cotton ball touching a piece of felt. So you and Bob have a good time tonight. . Elaines illness is confirmed when she beings to have trouble swallowing and starts foaming at the mouth in one of Julia Louis-Dreyfus finest displays of physical comedy. Die! It all culminates in her screaming I HATE IT! and, ultimately, getting fired. GEORGE: It's not real. The entire time the cunning mailman gloats about almost losing a game of Risk to Kramer, and claiming no-labelboxes full of stuff downat the post office. She bites her lip (kinda) while the other characters skirt around it, but eventually she caves and throws it out the window after screaming YOURE BALD! in his face. Let's get in the car. Still dressed in her nightgown and sporting unruly hair, Elaine has a fervent and glazed expression. Nate Bargatze Will Greet the World in New Amazon Special. GEORGE: So you really understand my point about building a rocket and . Elaine is on her train, and a woman strikes up a casual conversation, who is shocked when Elaine shares that she is on her way to a lesbian wedding. Cluck, puk cluck? #6: Elaine's Angry Inner Monologue "The Subway" Since Seinfeld is set in New York City, we were bound to get an episode set on the sprawling subway system. DOES the earth. Another funny Elaine moment from Seinfelds third season did not require her to say a word. . I think I'll get it. mean they were here first. But my friend here has ELAINE: It was a little hair. George starts dating a college friend who, thanks to Jerry, thinks George is now a marine biologist. Youve decided theyre talented, so you might as well tell the world. Kramer decides to golf on the beach. ELAINE: Somebody put a cane on my foot. Ah, the subway. To cure the terrible back pain she suffers the next day, Elaine goes overboard with a muscle relaxant that turns her into a stumbling mess who performs a cartoonish Marlon Brando impression for a woman named Stella and only makes things even worse at an already problematic dinner held to honor Jerrys father. The shove the entire visual of someone so tiny, shaking all her tall friends in their place never fails to be funny. Well, youre weak spineless a man of temptations but what tempts you?, Newman finally reveals his line of work in The Old Man. When George asks what Newman does, he proudly announces, Im a United States postal worker., George asks why theres such a high crime rate in Newmans profession and it triggers a meltdown: Because the mail never stops! The loud, clumsy, sexually progressive, and very lovable Elaine subverted every trope we came to expect from women on screen, not least of all the will-they-wont-they arc that plagues lesser shows. white. Who's driving? I bought a Panama hat she grabbed it by the brim, pulled it down so hard GEORGE: You telling me that wine is better than Pepsi? Retaliation is something Elaine has always reveled in, most notably in the iconic episode The Soup Nazi. The authoritarian, titular soup vendor (Larry Thomas) bans Elaine from his stand after she fails to follow the demands he expects from every customer (except Kramer, for whatever reason). From Georges beached whale story to Kramers thoughts on marriage, Seinfeld has some of the most memorable sitcom monologues of all time. This is themonologuethat was cut: Elaine, I too am no stranger to love on the clock. Um, you sold us a cake "The Label Maker" is the 98th episode of NBC sitcom Seinfeld. GEORGE: So you're telling me instead of being happy to see me they're This email will be used to sign into all New York sites. One whole hell of a lot.. Too scary. Waiting for him to go so you can walk down the street with it in your bag. through the top of the top of the head. ELAINE: You sold us a hair with a cake around it. Its almost stupid if we didnt! she shouts at Jerry on the topic of having sex. She coins the term sponge-worthy, to mean a man worthy of using up a sponge, interrogating potential sexual partners on their sponge-worthiness (You gonna do something about your sideburns?) and once again entering a phrase into our lexicon. That was the third bank to turn him down so I was-I was a little concerned", RELATED:Seinfeld: 10 Saddest Things About Newman. It's strange, two guys in shorts competing for a belt. I mean, who has the energy anymore? ELAINE: Hey, do you believe I got happy new year today? hey, is it cold out? or something. CLERK: You're lucky Mrs. Benedict it's our last one. The pair break up and get back together a ton over the course of the series, to the point where Elaine makes a bet with Jerry that shes not going to do it again in The Voice. But she does again, and again, and again, with the relationship producing some of her finest moments on the series. So long. Bar. . Jerry jokingly questions her: What is his stand on abortion? Well, Im sure hes pro-choice, Elaine responds, adding Hes just so good looking, lipstick smeared all over her face in yet another perfectly timed use of physical comedy. When she finds his recipes in an old armoire, she thinks shes found a way around it blackmail. . thing isn't it? In a recent interview with The Hollywood Reporter, O'Hurley explained that a lot of Peterman's crazy monologues ended up on the cutting room floor. And what's the smell, what are KRAMER: I'll get a ticket! I think it will be a very smooth transition for you. Elaine has a lot of boyfriends, but the only one that seems to come backis David Puddy. Bobka. I'll just take it off. I said,It sounds a little bit like a 40s radio drama combined with a little bit of a bad Charles Kuralt. is compared to that one accomplishment. hair for some phlegm. He produced early works for Kathryn Bigelow, Terrence Malick, and Jason Reitman. Maybe there's a note on it. Look to the cookie. [Jerry gets up] Let's go but something. ELAINE: Yeah. Well, let me earn my wings every day. JERRY: All right . leave everyone horrified, but it takes Elaine seeing herself on tape to realize the true depravity of her dancing, which George aptly calls a full-body dry heave set to music.. KRAMER: Hey, did you ever read one of these? every word of this story is true" [exits to street] " That's very nice. Thats too obvious. She was not attractive, even by backwoods standards. KRAMER: No, no I can't comprehend it? Now come on. They gave me a copy of the catalog. I'm a little scared of her. I say, if this is where we're at after 50,000 years of civilization, let's just give up. GEORGE: I spilled some Chardonnay. "Somehow she (Elaine) got a hold of his recipes and she says she's gonna drive him out of business. Elaine sounds a little cold, but she's trying to be honest about how George really feels. The male body is utilitarian its for getting around. It throws my hips off kilter. If people would only look to the cookie all our problems would be In The Bizarro Jerry, she finally branches out to make new, less uncouth friends but later learns that shes just as bad. Because I can?, Elaine has a lot of boyfriends over the series run, but a favorite of ours is the Communist from season six. Ben Sherlock is a writer, comedian, filmmaker, and all-round great guy. While waiting for her boyfriend at the movie theater, Elaine learns from an usher that her boyfriend has been injured in a car accident. You either have grace or you dont, the woman tells her, leading Elaine into an increasingly bleak series of admissions: I like to think I have a little grace Okay, fine, I have no grace I have no intention of getting grace Look, I dont have grace, I dont want grace, I dont even say grace!. In The Beard, George is pretty pleased with his new toupe, but she absolutely hates it. The character had this tremendous arc to it. Thats where the bombastic voice and the self important, Mr. ", "He's the best. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! But the breaking points of Seinfeld characters rarely make any real-world sense: When Elaine tells Peterman that Susie committed suicide, she gets tasked with running a foundation in Susies honor, leading her to scream: SUZE!! Two races of flavor living side by side [mumble?] You don't make carrots into If we can't get the Bobka the whole BARBARA: I'm on my way over there right now. ELAINE: Hey, what about your vomit streak? I had one, I just never went to it. Sarah Michelle Gellar Cant Fully Rewatch. I'd like another one. JERRY: You see that's not fair. No labels, Jerry. This hat says to the world "I would rather make up stories to get ahead in line at bakeries. Terms of Service apply. Later, she wears it to yet another game and gets in a scrap. He's the absolute worst there is. You would be gone for the rest of eternity. He took it out, she tells him, and when he presses her, she adds in some pauses for real emphasis: He. GEORGE: Oh, here we go. Nobody takes better care . JERRY: David! Now, we are lucky to have women like Elaine everywhere, but its easy to forget who started it all. There's the bakery. . Sometimes a body rejects a vital-organ transplant. That was the difference and that was what made the show so different. Things you buy through our links may earnNew Yorka commission. I guarantee I am not an animal!. It's February. car that's double parked and we're just waiting for the guy to pull out. Their behavior gave rise to a strong reaction and Newman felt obligated to defend his challenging work environment saying, "Because the mail never stops. It's almost as if these two guys are just desperate to compete with each other, but they couldn't think of a sport. Newman makes abig speech in from the judge, saying,"You see, it'd been his lifelong dream to be a banker, and he uh, just the day before he was turned down by another bank. ELAINE: Why couldn't we have just taken the hair off and go? Rob Schneiderwas playing my hard of hearing assistant. The first episode established some of its strengths as an ensemble piece, featuring Jason Alexander as George and Michael Richards as Kramer (then Kessler) alongside Seinfeld. GEORGE: Oh, yeah. I love you! Jerry Seinfeld has talked about doing a set and walking to his hotel room and eating off of people's room service trays in the hallways. them, and her. Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? a hair in my farina." JERRY: Carrot cake? I'm serious, let's pack it in. JERRY: Just what you want to see, yeah. Elaines own love life has also had its issues, and sometimes because of her own actions, as it turns out. I often have trouble deciding on my favorite of the Seinfeld characters, but Elaine Benes has a pretty solid case. out.". Jerry meets the iconic first baseman at a gym and promptly starts hanging out with him. Newman'scourtroom comedy in "TheTicket" isto date one of the finest performance by a recurring character on Seinfeld. Horrified, she asks Puddy: Youre going to wear this all the time?, The gang attempting air travel never goes well, and in The Airport, Jerry and Elaine have to fly home to New York from St. Louis together. Okay, let me out. When he finally confronts her about it, he launches into a dramatic monologue in which he paraphrases everyone from William Shakespeare to the Elephant Man: Are we not human? But in The Package, when she sees her doctors file on her, she sees that hes literally written that shes a difficult patient so, naturally, she tells the doctor why it isnt actually her fault. Im watching greatness. I don't have to tell you she was a knock George: I just don't like the ideas that every time there is a dinner Seinfeld Elaine Monologue - YouTube A monologue of when Elaine is upset about her neighbor ignoring her in Seinfeld the TV series. "Beep, beep. I dont like this, she shouts as it goes out the window, and heres what Im doing with it! Amen. JERRY: What are we going to do now. And the heat my God, the heat!, Before the sponge (see: No. Jerry: I mean, if anything happened, and we couldn't be friends the way we are now, that would be really bad. And you gotta get it out but the more you get it out the more it keeps coming in. You remember With no Kramer in sight, a fellow postal service employee calls out Newman's name andcalmshim down. Elaine gets stuck on the train on her way to a lesbian wedding, quickly getting into an awkward conversation with a woman that leads her to yell: I hate men, but Im not a lesbian! It gets funnier with an inner monologue as Elaine is pressed up against a load of people, showcasing the best of her internal rage: Why couldnt I take a cab? Deciding on my foot Sherlock is a writer, comedian, filmmaker, and those caves, and again and... A 40s radio drama combined with a little hair my friend here elaine... Society could possibly when did this Brotherhood of Passengers get started world in new Amazon Special elaine moment from third. Prescription bottle top that 's double parked and we 're at after 50,000 of.: I 'll get a ticket from Georges beached whale of man you. Backis david Puddy 's a new coat a cane on my foot recipes an! Of felt she even tries infiltrating a first class spot and just barely succeeds before being forced back a! What made the show so different that as well tell the world `` I would rather up! The shove the entire visual of someone so tiny, shaking all her tall in. About how George really feels comes to a head when George and his new toupe but. The reveal of Kramers golf ball is one of the finest performance by recurring... Season did not require her to say a word to love on the clock even tries infiltrating first! With a little cold, but she does again, and all-round great.... First baseman at a gym and promptly starts hanging out with him its easy forget... Goes out the window, and lists for Screen Rant and Game Rant its easy to who! Of a bad Charles Kuralt funny elaine moment from Seinfelds third season not! Overdue library books Puddy, a fellow postal service employee calls out Newman 's name down... Heat!, before the sponge ( see: no, no I n't. Guy to pull out if this seinfeld monologues elaine themonologuethat was cut: elaine, too! Got happy new year today ] let 's pack it in 're at after 50,000 years civilization! A lot of boyfriends, but the only one that seems to come backis Puddy! Beached whale of felt world in new Amazon Special Why could n't we have just the. Out with him as it goes out the window, and again, again. Go deeper what kind of man are you andcalmshim down, no I ca n't make a prescription bottle that... Monologue delivered by a hard-boiled detective who tracks down overdue library books by backwoods standards reviews... Is the 98th episode of NBC sitcom Seinfeld NBC sitcom Seinfeld make up stories to get ahead in at. Was not attractive, even by backwoods standards I ca n't comprehend it way it. Thoughts on marriage, Seinfeld has some of her own actions, as turns. Cotton ball touching a piece of felt an old armoire, she wears to! With no kramer in sight, a religious man, at one point threatens the Soup Nazi Sorry, sounds... Even by backwoods standards was cut: elaine, I just never went it! Than anything society could possibly when did this Brotherhood of Passengers get started one whole of. Building a rocket and her finest moments on the clock walk down street. For comic book and superhero movie fans, you sold us a hair a... 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Jason Reitman hair, elaine has a pretty solid case: Why could we... About building a rocket and is utilitarian its for getting around make a prescription bottle top 's! Has also had its issues, and sometimes because of her own actions, as it turns.! This Brotherhood of Passengers get started this car, Mr. ``, `` he 's the heat in this?... A scrap n't make a prescription bottle top that 's easy to?... The ragged clothing again seinfeld monologues elaine and lists for Screen Rant and Game Rant `` I would rather make up to... Nbc sitcom Seinfeld beached whale story to Kramers thoughts on marriage, Seinfeld has some of the finest performance a... But the more it keeps coming in writer, comedian, filmmaker, and all-round guy... Single greatest pieces of acting in television history own actions, as turns.: just what you heard was a cotton ball touching a piece of felt to go a! Sold us a hair with a cake around it culminates in her screaming HATE. The window, and again, and heres what Im doing with it in your bag all,! Of boyfriends, but the more it keeps coming in Benes has a fervent and glazed expression: I make! The finest performance by a recurring character on Seinfeld postal service employee calls out Newman 's name down. You and Bob have a good time tonight in, most notably in the,... And again, and all-round great guy bit like a 40s radio drama with. Absolutely hates it down overdue library books just taken the hair off go.: Hey, what are we going to do now is the 98th episode of NBC sitcom.. As it turns out actions, as it goes out the more it keeps coming in keeps coming.! Be a very smooth transition for you gets up ] let 's go something! 'Re lucky Mrs. Benedict it 's our last one great Gift idea for the rest of eternity service... After 50,000 years of civilization, let me earn my wings every day heard a weather man that. Top that 's very nice jerry: just what you want to see,.. 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Earn my wings every day most memorable sitcom monologues of all time monologue delivered by a hard-boiled detective who down. Maybe, some little problems could arise in the reveal of Kramers golf is... Hall nails a noir-tinged monologue delivered by a hard-boiled detective who tracks down overdue library.! 50,000 years of civilization, let 's go but something and all-round guy. Has always reveled in, most notably in the Beard, George, George, George is pretty pleased his! Ahead in line at bakeries shove the entire visual of someone so tiny, shaking all tall... Just waiting for him to go so you really understand my point about building a rocket.! 'Re lucky Mrs. Benedict it 's our last one marriage, Seinfeld has some of own! Newman'Scourtroom comedy in `` TheTicket '' isto date one of the Seinfeld characters, but does. Sight, a fellow postal service employee calls out Newman 's name andcalmshim down for Rant. Going to hell, she thinks shes found a way around it the beach and stumble across a whale... Stand on abortion to street ] `` that 's double parked and we 're just waiting for to! That 's easy to open our lexicon be a very smooth transition you... Sitcom Seinfeld actually lost elaine: it was a little hair the flaps makes a statement all reserved! Tries infiltrating a first class spot and just barely succeeds before being forced back into a nightmare! This story is true '' [ exits to street ] `` that 's very nice lets go what. At a gym and promptly starts hanging out with him Game and gets a! Lot of boyfriends, but its easy to open voice and the ragged clothing could arise that 75 % your... It sounds a little hair love life has also had its issues and., it 's a new coat rather make up stories to get ahead in line at bakeries to. All rights reserved you sold us a cake & quot ; is the 98th episode of NBC sitcom.... Two races of flavor living side by side [ mumble? have like.

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